Birth is like an earthquake – we don’t know when it will hit or exactly how it will be, but we do know for sure that it will be intense, that it will forever alter our landscape in some way, and that it will surely shake things up.
Everything I’ve learned about birth from a medical standpoint has taught me that we cannot predict anything about how the birth will go. The true task of labor is to fully relax and relinquish control. Let go, let your body do the work, let your body do what it is made to do. And yes, understand that the one thing we do know is that we have no idea how it will actually go down.
I agree with this – 50%. I also think birth is a lot like life. Energy follows intention, and physical form follows that energy. Which means, when we get really clear and specific about how we want things to go and what we want – in this case let’s use the example of an easy, safe, smooth home birth experience – things start to move in that direction. If we have no clear sense of desire or vision, we tend to drift along and roll with what comes. Just like the rest of life, birth is one half going with the flow. The other half of all of this is imagining exactly how you want it to be and giving that dream your undivided attention. Relentless and yielding. Uncompromising and flexible. Willing and able.
Just like anything (everything) else, having a clear vision and strong intention is key to having a successful home birth. By directing our minds, we guide our energy and lead our bodies towards our goals.
Here Are Five Helpful Steps For A Successful Home Birth
1) Get (Deep) Into Your Own Mind
This is truly the most important one. Journal, collage, vision board, envision, and research. Get really clear about your dream of how you want everything to go. Do you picture yourself birthing during the daytime or night time? Do you imagine laughing or crying? Do you picture squeezing your spouse’s hands until they wince in pain? Notice any fears that come up – especially any restrictions or hesitations. You can read about my process HERE.
2) Be Honest With Yourself
About your fears, your preferences, your concerns – as early on as you can – even before you’re actually pregnant if you can do that. Get in deep and work it out. Nothing is deeper than growing a brand new human being in the pit of your belly. Nothing. So get down in it and look at your stuff. Talk to someone. Talk to everyone. Go to therapy if you want, or a hypnobirthing class, or anyone else that you feel really comforatble around. Get your journal out, get your friends on the phone, and call your Grandmother or your Great-Aunt or a friend’s Grandma as well. (Grandma Festa pulled out her Grandma mind-ninja moves on me at 37 weeks pregnant! It was amazing.)
3) Relax Your Body
Pregnancy is an intense time for our bodies, whether we experience any of the symptoms that are notoriusly uncomfortable or not. There is a doubled blood volume, a shift in hormones, added weight, and a shift in our center of gravity. It’s important to nourish and relax our bodies during this time – and relaxation is the number one key to an easier labor.
4) Get Your Team Together
Doulas, acupuncturists, midwives, back-up doctors, photographers, sisters, best friends, husbands, videographers, cooks, cleaning crew, etc. – whoever you want to be your support team – get them together and get to LOVE them. If there is someone on your crew you don’t feel good about, have a responsible conversation about it and create the relationship you want with them or kindly request that they do not attend your home birth.
5) Commit Yourself to Great Health
During your pregnancy, it is essential that you eat well. Think variety, local, seasonal, organic, all of the food groups, and nutrient density. For more tips on how to do that read HERE. Walks, breathing, relaxing, stress management, hydration, stretching – are a few important health practices. You will want to be mindful of caffeine and sugar intake. It’s not necessary to omit them completely, but to be honest with yourself about staying on the healthy side of the threshold. Pregnancy is a time to get the best and most sleep you can. If you have particular health concerns, or if any of these basics of nutrition, sleep, exercise, and play/ stress relief is a challenge to you, this is the time to reach out for support. Alternative medicine can be a great asset in your gestational arsenal. And a healthy body will make all of the difference when you step onto the field for your big birthing moment.
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